A meltdown in the middle of the shop

Baby Mo wanted a toy off the shelf, Umi said no. He dropped straight to the shop floor, screaming. Every head turned. My face burned.

I used to just give in to end it fast. But this time I crouched, took a breath, and didn't catch his panic. I just said softly: "Mo is angry. Umi will stay with you until it passes." Then quiet. Accompanying, not fighting.

The storm took time, but it passed on its own. A two-year-old has no brakes for his emotions yet — the only brakes he has are ours. If we erupt too, that's two people in a storm. If we stay calm, he has something to hold.

The strong one is not the good wrestler; the strong one is he who controls himself when angry. (Bukhari 6114, Muslim 2609)

After it passed, Umi hugged him. No lecture. The toy still wasn't bought — but Baby Mo learned that his anger doesn't frighten Umi, and doesn't win either.